I guess this is my rant blog post.
I have an 11 month old. Will be turning 1 soon and there has been a lot of reflecting on life and the past 11 months. Maybe I’m judging myself a bit too hard because I am trying to fit in to the “perfect mom” role. Not quite sure what it is that has been sitting in the back of my mind about this “parenting” thing. I keep asking myself whether I’m a good mom or not? Is my child a reflection of my parenting skills? Maybe I should have read more books or maybe I should have Googled less. Who knows. but this is hard and I can’t believe I’m still pretty well put together after 11 months of maximum 5 hours straight of sleep, working full-time and being a full time student and not only that but also taking care of daily house work. I have to say I truly admire everyone who does this and more without complaining. Well I’m not really complaining, this is more like speaking out loud (in writing).
One thing I am tired of is how people tend to judge babies. They meet a baby and they point out things about them… My kid cries when he sees people he is not familiar with. He is not too heavy, not sure what the weight requirement is for an 11 month old, he likes to yell randomly (wish I knew what the yelling was for), it’s usually happy yelling though not like tantrum yelling. I am tired of comments about other babies and how they compare to mine. Why must they try to categorize all babies into one.
Every parent is different. Every person has a different life. Every adult has different responsibilities. Every person has different obstacles, different blessings. Not one person is the same as the other, so my question is, why must our children be the same?
My child is not perfect, to me he is, but I know he may not be on the top of the growth chart, he may be behind on walking, im not quite sure. There’s many charts to show milestones, to show growth range, food charts, sleep charts, etc, you name it. These are only guidelines. Guidelines to help a parent know their child is progressing. As adults for example, when we go to school, do we all get the same grade, umm no, that’s why there different letter grades, why??… because we all learn differently we all have different strengths and different weaknesses.
Instead of comparing our children or other children why don’t we embrace their qualities. We should celebrate their accomplishments and work on their downfalls. We are their teachers, their mentors, their guides to help bring out the best in them so they can grow to be unique adults that have a heart to offer love to others and a healthy brain to offer the world opinions and answers. We should work on being a better human every day. As a parent I have learned that I cannot live my life through my child. I need to learn from him and also teach him.
Lets make the world a better place. Through smiles, through celebration of life, the good and the bad.
Embrace everyone’s uniqueness and celebrate their happiness.